Thursday, December 28, 2017

2017: My Year in Review

It’s become something of a tradition to begin these year-in-review posts with an apology for not having blogged enough over the course of the year just gone by, and I think that’s especially fitting this year, because last year I didn’t even do a year-in-review posts. 2016 was a doozy guys. You know. You were there. Well, 2017 has been rough, too. Here’s what I’ve been up to this year.

I Became Politically Active, Sort Of

I started my year by going to Washington, D.C. with some friends to participate in the Women’s March on Washington, which was a lot bigger than I think any of us expected it to be.

The Trumpy Cat shirt was a good choice.
I didn’t stop there. I started paying attention to politics, sort of, and I started using Resist Bot to fax and email my representatives in Congress RE: exactly how they’re disappointing me each week. I’ve also taken to sending angry tweets to Senator Shelley Moore Capito, which may or may not be keeping me from getting any of the really good jobs. This has kind of backfired on me, though, because it’s caused the Twitter algorithms to show me Senator Capito’s tweets first. This, of course, causes me to send more angry replies, which causes the algorithm to show me more of Senator Capito’s tweets…I’m caught in a vicious cycle, is what I’m saying.

I Got Fat

Oh, you guys, as my primary care doctor won’t stop reminding me, I was already fat. I got fatter. It’s okay, though, because I was out walking around today and it was like minus twelve degrees Fahrenheit, and I was only a little bit cold, because I had my fat jacket on. Of course I had my fat jacket on, because you can’t just take the fat jacket off. It’s inconvenient that way.

I Earned My Master’s Degree

I’m still having that recurring nightmare that I get called up and told that I didn’t take a required course or that I failed a class and didn’t earn the degree after all. In the dream, it’s always a French class that I didn’t pass, even though my Masters in Professional Writing and Editing involved ZERO French classes – I didn’t even have to take the foreign language exam because I have a BA in French. Sometimes I fail the French class outright, but sometimes I just stop attending and forget to drop it before the deadline. They don’t always take away my degree, however. Sometimes they just lower my GPA to – brace yourselves – a 3.0.

I’m also still having the recurring nightmare where I’ve forgotten to attend a class (one of my actual classes, not a fake French class) all semester and am about to fail it. That is, when I’m not having the recurring nightmare that my conference paper is due tomorrow and I haven’t even started the research yet.

My Cat, Penny, Died

Facebook memories are harsh these days, man. I can’t bring myself to change my phone wallpaper, either. I still have it set to her picture.

Miss you, sweetie :'(

I Went to the Beach

Jim's parents rented a beach house in Pauley's Island, South Carolina, so we went to the beach for a few days. Then we spent some time in the Smoky Mountains, where we both remembered how much we hate camping. I'm sure we'll go camping again next year, and hate it just as much.

I Got a Kitten

Jim wanted to name him Connor, but the rescue people were calling him Little, and that seemed to fit, because he was, indeed, very little when I brought him home to live. Plus, he responded to it. But, as I think I’ve mentioned, he has the worst gas I’ve ever smelled. Even the vet has commented on it at his kitten checkups. I’ve told him he stinks so many times that now he thinks his name is Stinky. So, Stinky he is.

Jim is appalled by this, btw. “You can’t call him Stinky! It’s an insult!” he insists, even though he has met Fatty. If only Jim had been around in the days when I was still calling Max Skin Disease. In retrospect, I should have called him, Max, Scabby – it would have been catchier.

 I Got Engaged

Jim and I were discussing this with his parents the other day, and we were both pretty sure we got engaged before Thanksgiving. My post history tells me that we actually announced the engagement at the end of October, but I didn’t get the ring until the first week of November. I probably should have made Jim propose at Christmas, but I could tell he was too excited to wait. Also, what’s the point of a Christmas proposal when it’s just the two of you? That shit requires an audience.

I Got a New Couch

This might not seem like a big deal, but it’s the first couch I’ve ever bought brand new (well, I did buy my psycho ex a futon, but futons don’t count). Previous couches I’ve owned were either purchased from the Goodwill (1), found in the house or apartment when I moved in (3), or brought by Jim (1). Jim’s couch bit it when we invited my friend Mark to join us on it at our Halloween party. All three of us are large people, and the poor couch just collapsed. So Jim and I went the next day and splurged on a new couch at Big Lots. It came already put together and everything.

I Got a Roomba

Jim got me a Roomba for Christmas. It’s not actually a Roomba, it’s an off-brand robot vacuum called an iLife – an iLife V3s, to be exact. I have outsourced vacuuming duties to a robot. It’s amazing. Sure, there’s this big spot next to the TV that it just consistently misses, but I’m okay with that. Sometimes it gets stuck under a cabinet or something and if I don’t come to rescue it right away, it quietly gives up and goes to sleep – can’t blame it, really. With the time I’m saving, I’ll be able to clean the bathroom once in a while.